November 5, 2025

BG’s Positively Speaking

The Job Search

Just as the kinds of work available to us are changing, so are the ways we find new employment, or that first job. The competition for jobs requires that we re–examine the way in which we find a new position. We need to master the ‘new’ skills of finding and landing a new job. Here are some things that we need to be aware of.

NETWORKING: Many positions are never advertised. They’re often filled through the networking efforts of those hired. They use their contacts to find out what’s happening in their industry —who’s moving, who’s got a position to fill — and they often get personal introductions.

SOCIAL MEDIA: Exercise caution on sites like Facebook. Many employers are checking out applicants on these sites. An indiscreet or negative comment you have made, or has been made about you, even if meant in fun, could cost you a job you wanted. Check your social media, get them cleaned up before you start your job hunt.

THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX: Be creative in attracting employers to look in your direction.

After three applications to a company, with no luck. A woman working at a local coffee shop frequented by the HR Manager knew his favourite coffee and donut. Determining that he was in the office and on his break, she delivered his donut, coffee, and a resume to the reception desk, with instructions to give them during his coffee break. Three weeks later, she was working for the company. Being creative sends a positive message to future employers. Keep your creativity within acceptable bounds.

While thinking outside the box, why not consider becoming your own boss? If you have to learn new job-finding skills, then why not? There are many opportunities out there, and being “between jobs’ provides an excellent opportunity.

Mitch & Maude

Tongue Twisters

The first is a variation of Carolyn Wells’ “The Butter Betty Bought,” published in 1899.

1. Betty bought a bit of butter.
   But the butter Betty bought was bitter.
   So Betty bought a better butter,
   And it was better than the butter Betty bought before.
2. Silly Sally swiftly shooed seven silly sheep.
   The seven silly sheep Silly Sally shooed
   Shilly-shallied south.
3. These sheep shouldn’t sleep in a shack. Sheep should sleep in a shed.
   The Guinness Book of World Records says that this is the toughest tongue twister, so far.
   The sixth sick sheik’s sixth sheep is sick.

Heard On A Plane

As a Delta Air Lines jet was flying over Arizona on a clear day, the co-pilot was providing his passengers with a running commentary about landmarks over the PA system. “Coming up on the right, you can see the Meteor Crater, which is a major tourist attraction in northern Arizona. It was formed when a lump of nickel and iron, roughly 150 feet in diameter and weighing 300,000 tons, struck the Earth at about 40,000 miles an hour, scattering white-hot debris for miles in every direction. The hole measures nearly a mile across and is 570 feet deep.” From the cabin, a passenger was heard to exclaim, “Wow! It just missed the highway!”

The French Waitress

An American is sitting in a Paris cafe, working on his laptop. He tells the waitress, “I’d like a cup of coffee, please, with no cream.”

The waitress replies, “I’m sorry, monsieur, but we’re out of cream. How about with no milk?”                                                                      

Editors Quote Book

“Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it,”

—P.J. O’Rourke

Church Bulletin Blunders!

(Typo’s And Funnies found in Church Bulletins)

Bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.

The Associate Minister unveiled the church’s new campaign slogan last Sunday: ‘I Upped My Pledge – Up Yours.’

The World Serious

There was a win for Canada in it’s loss of the World Series for The Toronto Blue Jays’. A victory of spirit for Canada. From coast to coast, people in every province, regardless of politics, region, or background came together as one nation, united in pride and excitement for a Canadian team challenging an American powerhouse. For a few shining weeks, cheering for the Jays reminded Canadians of what connects them.  Passion, hope, and a shared love for the game.  Even without the trophy, the Blue Jays gave the country something far greater a renewed sense of community and national pride that will be remembered far longer than the final score, helping us weather the storm of changing times.

Trivia Quiz

(Click Question For Answer)

Your Horoscope

For Amusement Only

Aries Mar 21 – Apr 19:  Someone of significance could casually appear in your life. Enjoy the hectic pace that you are experiencing; it won’t last.

Taurus Apr 20 – May 20:  Sometimes less is more. Don’t be in a big hurry to commit everything; hold back and leave some in reserve.

Gemini May 21 – Jun 20: If you want something, let your “sweet” side show. Remember, you attract more flies with honey than with vinegar.

Cancer Jun 21 – Jul 22: Give your boss a pat on the back; they need encouragement occasionally. Show that you appreciate them.

Leo Jul 23 – Aug 22:    Laughter will prove to be a healing factor in overcoming some recent let-downs. Get together with friends and have fun.

Virgo Aug 23 – Sept 22:     Your self-esteem is sagging. Seek out the company of those who are on your team. Trust in your instincts.

Libra Sept 23 – Oct 22: We’re past the halfway point in the year. Take stock and make sure you are on course to your goals.

Scorpio Oct 23 – Nov 21:  You become the centre of attention. Make sure that you show your gratitude to those who made it possible.

Sagittarius Nov 22 – Dec 21: Don’t accept someone else’s ideas. Do your own research and then take the time to sort through the facts.

Capricorn Dec 22 – Jan 19:   Some suppressed anger is causing you to make some bad decisions. Be aware and take positive action to correct the situation.

Aquarius Jan 20 – Feb 18:  Trust in a friend. Unburden your heart, share your troubles, and lighten your load. A trouble shared is a trouble halved.

Pisces Feb 19 – Mar 20:   Some feedback from associates gives you a new insight into office politics. Stay out of the games and stay safe.

A Lightning Strike

Steve, Bob, and Jeff are out golfing on a cloudy day, when it starts raining furiously. Suddenly, Steve is struck by lightning and is killed instantaneously. After the ambulance leaves with Steve’s body, Bob and Jeff realize they’ll have to inform his wife. Bob says he’s good at this sort of sensitive stuff, so he volunteers to do the job. After two hours, he returns, carrying a six-pack of beer. “So, did you tell her?” asks Jeff. “Yep”, replies Bob. Then Jeff asked, “Say, where did you get the six-pack?” Bob informs Jeff, “She gave it to me.” “WHAT??” exclaims Jeff, “You just told her that her husband died and she gave you a six pack?” “Sure,” Bob says. “WHY?” asks Jeff. “Well,” Bob continues, “when she answered the door, I asked her, ‘Are you Steve’s widow?’  ‘Widow?’ she said, ‘No, no, you’re mistaken, I’m not a widow!’

So I said: “I’ll bet you a six-pack you ARE!”

He Won’t Do That Again!

Click To Enlarge

A driver crossing the Walnut Street Bridge in Green Bay, Wisconsin, ignored the traffic arm, drove around it, and onto the drawbridge as it was opening. The van dropped into the opening span, then rolled back down into the gap between the fixed portion of the bridge and the moving parts. Concerned that the van might slide into the gap, Green Bay Metro firefighters cut a hole in its roof to rescue the driver.

I’ll Be Back?

The Dearborn, Michigan, Police feel that a thief’s unusual Haul may draw him back to the scene. A video at a Walgreens caught a bald man walking away with seven boxes of Rogaine, a hair-growth lotion. “This is not the most hair-raising crime”, said the chief of police, “but we suspect he will continue committing this type of crime, because 12 to 14 months of consistent use is needed to see results.”

Bar Talk

Three men were discussing coincidences at a bar. The first man said, “My wife was reading a ‘Tale of two cities’ and she gave birth to twins.” “That’s funny”, the second man remarked, “my wife was reading ‘the three musketeers’ and she gave birth to triplets.” The third man shouted, “Good God, I have to rush home!” When asked what the problem was, he exclaimed, “When I left the house, my wife was reading Ali baba and the forty Thieves”!!!

An Irish Welcome

An oxymoron (oxymora) is a figure of speech that combines two typically contradictory terms. A longer list can be found on Wikipedia.

Classmates?

While waiting for my first appointment in the reception room of a new dentist, I noticed his certificate, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered that a tall, handsome boy with the same name had been in my high school class some 45 years ago. Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was too old to have been my classmate. After he had examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended the local high school. “Yes,” he replied. “When did you graduate?” I asked. “In 1952.” He responded. “Why”,  I exclaimed, “you were in my class?”. He looked at me closely and then asked, “What did you teach?”

The Last Word

Prepare Today For What Tomorrow May Bring.